hush baby girl, don't you cry. [20 Apr 2006|11:54am] [ mood | sad ] I miss my grandpa more than words can say right now... and that's all I have to say =( 1 comment|post comment

Someday i'll fly away... [24 Mar 2006|12:05am] Of everything I've been through in my nineteen years of living, I try so hard to be the optimistic person I know I can be. I know that everything happens for a reason. But why? Friends backstab friends. Fathers beat up mothers. Lovers wound the hearts of other lovers. Children disappoint their parents. People kill people. It never ends. Who's learning from all of this? All we're learning is to hate our parents, hate our friends… hate people. Since I was a child, I never really knew how to trust anyone. And throughout my entire life, I've never stopped contradicting people. I questioned every single person I met because I don't know how to put my trust in anyone. To this day, I still don't know how. I don't even think I trust God. Every time I put my trust in someone, they hurt me. I just don't think I can do this anymore. Sometimes I want to just runaway and disappear. Everyone seems so fake. Life seems so fake. Sometimes I wonder if I'm fake? I can't tell the difference anymore. I don't know what's black and what's white. I just don't know… 1 comment|post comment

This is so fkn true. [11 Mar 2006|12:06am] Stability results were very low which suggests you are extremely worrying, insecure, emotional, and anxious. Orderliness results were low which suggests you are overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense too often of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment. Extraversion results were moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity. ------------------------------------------------------- i got 90 for these traits... Individuality-- wants to be as independent from society as possible, self expressive, most people think they are crazy, unpredictable, more random than controlled, drawn to careers where creativity is a solitary pursuit, grew up feeling that they had to stand out to be happy, dissatisfied with the ordinary and non dramatic, lives an experimental life, driven by curiousity, reckless Histrionic-- gets angry and frustrated if they don't get what they want, likes to be popular, desires more attention, competes for the spotlight, grew up feeling they had to stand out to be happy, gets attention through negative behavior, frequently feels envious, superficial, feels best when admired, wants things done their way, used to getting their way, uses their looks to get what they want, quick tempered, impulsive, vain, performer, entertainer, pleasure seeking, prefers instant gratification, wealth seeking Paranoia-- suspicious of others until they have proven themselves trustworthy, more doubt than belief, preoccuppied with death and suffering, fears being harmed or controlled, bitter, looks for hidden meaning in things, personality is centered around low self esteem issues, feels misunderstood, defensive, often experiences disgust, love-hate relationships with most things, likes to test people's loyalty, thinks life is overrated, focuses on suffering, feels like an outsider, existentially depressed, does not trust what people say, prone to shame, suffers from depression, knows the dark side of life very well, attracted to things associated with sadness, would rather remain alone than risk rejection, hard to get to know, makes enemies Hypersensitivity-- tends to get too emotional, feels gloomy and distraught frequently, more past than future, not confident in their opinions or abilities, dislikes themself, prone to paranoia, affected by the moods of others, ideal love seeking, expressive, dramatic, tempermental, fears loss and separation, poor self image, gets very attached to people and things, hopeless romantic, focuses on suffering, desires security and support, suffers from loneliness, feels invisible, fears rejection in relationships, can't control romantic feelings and thoughts, prone to panic attacks, feelings guide most of their behavior, can't handle people being mad at them, dreams about a rescuer, daydreams about people to maintain a sense of closeness, familiar with the role of victim, worries they will make the wrong choices, conflicts between thoughts and feelings, desires more attention Female Cliche-- uses their looks to get what they want, likes to wear tight fitting clothing, likes to wear makeup, believes looking good is more important than comfort, emotional, does not like to dress plainly, cares about how they look to others, likes to dress provocatively, takes notice of people's teeth, keeps up an appearance, believes they get what they want because of how they look, feels best when others find them physically attractive, seductive, prefers attractive design over good engineering, fears being unwanted or unworthy of love Materialism-- wealth seeking, competitive, selfish, preoccupied with money, believes they deserve to have whatever they want (sense of entitlement), believes there is nothing wrong with marrying partly for money, second place is not good enough ------------------------------------------------------- trait snapshot: craves attention, messy, open, rash, irritable, likes large parties, low self control, weird, fragile, does not like to be alone, emotionally sensitive, worrying, depressed, heart over mind, does not respect authority, dependent, not rule conscious, not good at saving money, more interested in relationships than intellectual pursuits, likes to fit in, very social, frequently second guesses self, phobic, suspicious, not careful, outgoing, vain, compassionate, aggressive, likes to make fun, hates to lose. ------------------------------------------------------- This all just pretty much means i'm fucked up in the head. LOL take it for yourself HERE. 2 comments|post comment

You lose, you learn. [07 Mar 2006|10:34am] i finally made another one of these. we'll see how long i last. i'll update later... peace 7 comments|post comment

navigation [ viewing | most recent entries ]